Understanding Stress and How To Manage It
Takeaways
Stress is an inevitable, normal part of life.
Your tolerance to stress depends on many factors, from your genetic makeup to life experience to natural personality type.
Fortunately, beyond simply relying on your natural coping style, there are several strategies you could use to bolster your stress resilience and improve overall wellbeing.
Stress-management strategies include shifting your mindset, talking about your feelings with a confidant, and more.
Stress is a normal part of life. Some people can adapt well to what others perceive as highly stressful events. Other people crumble at the slightest challenge or frustration they encounter. There are many things that affect our tolerance to stress, such as:
Genetic makeup: Some of us are more genetically “stress susceptible” than others.
Life experience: Past stress can build us up or break us down, depending on when the stress happened and how powerful it was.
Environment: Natural environments (e.g., outdoors, spaces with lots of windows and natural lighting) calm us down. We also feel more relaxed in environments we think we can control, such as our homes.
Support network: A strong network of supportive friends and family members (which can include pets) is a powerful buffer against the stress of life. Conversely, loneliness and isolation worsen stress.
Natural personality type: If you have confidence in yourself and your ability to influence events and persevere through challenges, it’s easier to take stressful events in your stride. People who are more vulnerable to stress tend to feel like they don’t have the ability to change the events around them.
Perception of control: Stress becomes most traumatic when we feel trapped. If we are successfully able to fight or flee, we tend to recover better. But if we feel unable to change the situation, we will go to the next stage stress response, the “freeze” response. This is when we feel helpless, hopeless, and paralyzed.
Attitude and outlook: Optimistic, proactive, and positive attitudes are more stress resistant.
Ways to cope with stress
People deal with stress in different ways (i.e., they employ different coping styles). For example, some people approach issues with a problem-solving attitude (e.g., by asking themselves “What can I do about this problem?”) and try to change their situation to reduce stress. This is known as “problem-focused coping”.
Other people, on the other hand, may learn to be more accepting of their situation by telling themselves that the problem is not as bad as they think—a style known as “emotion-focused” coping.
Beyond simply relying on your natural coping style, you can also help yourself to relax in a variety of ways. Here are a few tips that’ll help boost your body’s happy chemicals and build your stress resilience.
Mind
Focus on making progress, not achieving perfection.
Focus on things you can control.
Accept that you cannot control everything.
Maintain a positive attitude. Instead of wishing the situation were different or insisting the circumstances are unfair, focus on your reaction. For example, if you are caught in a traffic jam, realize that you cannot control traffic speed. But you can control what you do while in your car, such as listening to your favorite music. Thinking about the facts and re-focusing your attention can help reduce the intensity of negative emotions.
Action
Count to 20 in your head. Excuse yourself from the situation if possible.
Take a break from whatever is making you feel stressed.
Take a few deep breaths. Relax your stomach muscles. Place one hand just below your ribs. Take a slow, deep breath through your nose, and feel your hand move up. Now breathe out slowly through your mouth and feel your hand move down.
Talk about your feelings with a friend or counselor. Ask for help if needed.
Keep a sense of humor—laughing helps to reduce stress.
Cut back on caffeine. Studies have shown that caffeine increases the secretion of cortisol and epinephrine (adrenaline), the same hormones secreted by our body during times of stress. Consuming caffeine during stressful periods is thus adding stress to stress!
Get moving! Exercise is an excellent way of relieving stress. Do something active—even if it’s just walking around a block or even slow stretching exercises such as yoga.
Do something fun that you enjoy—shopping, dancing, or calling a friend. Get a massage, take a hot bath, have a cup of herbal tea, or listen to calming music.
Get enough sleep—at least 8 hours per night.